NLP is the study of excellence that was created to answer one simple question: How can I do whatever I am doing even better? Just like physics studies the structure of the atomic world, and chemistry studies the structure of the molecular world, NLP studies the structure of our mental and emotional world. The laws of physics apply to anything made of atoms, the laws of chemistry apply to anything made of molecules, and the laws of NLP apply to anything made of thoughts and emotions. So, if you want to be and do anything more successfully, whether building a business, healing your body, or reaching enlightenment, NLP has concepts, models and techniques to help you do just that.
The core principle of NLP is that success and failure are not random. Our thoughts and our feelings, our behaviors and our beliefs, our environment and our values create success and failure. The reason we think, feel, behave, believe the way we do is because that's what we were taught (directly or indirectly) by our families, schools and cultures. If everyone in your family overeats, then you will tend to overeat too, because your parents were exemplars of a 'good human being' for you when you were young, and you modeled them indiscriminately. The key point here to realize is that all these things that people identify with (e.g. "I am poor") and believe is their fixed lot in life (e.g. "I have attention deficit disorder"), is changeable. More than that, most of it is *easily* changeable - your environments, your behaviors, your capabilities, your beliefs, your values, even your identity and spiritual purpose.
We know that right now you are jumping up and down and yelling: "Yes, finally I can get rid of all this crap that has been holding me back all my life and become successful and live my dreams. Show me how!" And, in fact, NLP will do just that for you. But first we want to explain how NLP works.
At the heart of NLP lies a technology for modeling how people do what they do and then rapidly transferring that knowledge to others. For example, if you want to become extraordinarily creative, we would first start by modeling how you manage to stay uncreative (remember, failure also has structure). Then we would find somebody who already is extraordinarily creative, someone like Walt Disney, and model how they achieve amazing creative success. As the final step, we would teach you how to let go of your old uncreative strategy and how to, instead, use Disney's extraordinarily creative strategy. That's it. It's as simple as that.
We can model pretty much anything - investing, leadership, negotiation, salesmanship, interviewing, emotional resilience, bravery, self-healing, inner peace, passion, etc. In fact, now that NLP has been around for over thirty years, it's even easier than that. Over all these years many brilliant people have been modeled, and for most anything that you would want, we already have a tested model. By the way, the outcome of the modeling process is an NLP technique, which is a sequence of behavioral-cognitive-emotional steps you would need to take to get the result. (Sometimes the outcome of the modeling process is an NLP model, which is a generalized technique that applies to a much wider set of contexts).
What set of principles is NLP based on?
Underneath all the techniques and all the models, NLP stands on several core beliefs. These beliefs are neither true nor false, but they are highly useful in everyday life. These beliefs are held by most of the successful people on our planet, and they help tremendously in creating the kind of life that you want to live. Because these are beliefs and not laws of life, the number of these beliefs and their phrasing vary from trainer to trainer. We have put together the core set of these beliefs and their explanations:
People respond to their map of reality, not to the reality itself. Fundamentally, it is not possible to know reality directly; we know it only through our senses. As information passes through our sensory organs and is processed by the brain, it gets distorted, deleted and generalized. The way the information is transformed is governed by our mental and emotional filters, by our beliefs, and by our focus of attention. The filters, the beliefs, and the attention are all a result of our past and are highly individual. What is stressful to one, is peaceful to another. What is funny to one, is boring to another. Each one of us can only respond to their map of reality, and these maps of realities are widely different. It is silly to get upset at someone thinking or responding differently then yourself, because if you had their map of reality, you would think and respond the same way they do.
Energy flows where attention goes. This belief was modeled from Hawaiian shamans. Our mental and emotional muscles work on the same principle as our bodies - what you exercise, becomes stronger. The exercise machine of the mind is attention; wherever you direct it, there the energy flows and the part under focus becomes stronger. If you focus on illness, you give power to it. If you focus on trouble, you give power to that. If you focus on how much people love you, you give power to that. Ever observed how after you decided that you like a particular car, all of a sudden you started noticing it everywhere? Energy flows where attention goes.
Behind every behavior is a positive intent. Yes, every single behavior. Even Hitler's. It is important to understand that the positive intent is (often) for the person himself, not for the other people. Similarly, every one of your behaviors has a positive intent for some part of you. Maybe not for the whole of you, but for the part doing the behavior. Smoking is clearly not healthy overall, yet it often has many positive intents such as relaxation, social acceptance or mental escape.
People always make the best choice they can at the time. People live in their maps of reality, and always choose the best option they can see. It might not be your or our best option, but for them it seems the best. If someone is making a poor choice, just keep in mind that they either don't know what else they can do or don't understand that a better option exists. Until we become enlightened, our minds have different parts (or roles) that activate at different times, and depending on which part is active at the moment, people have different sets of choices available to them at different times. The part that's running the show at the moment always makes the best choice for itself, even if it's unhealthy for the rest of you. Snoozing the alarm clock five times and coming late to work seems dumb to the part of you that comes to work, yet makes plenty of sense in the world of the part of you that is trying to get some sleep after a late night yesterday.
Choice is better than no choice. Right on the footsteps of the previous belief, if we always make the best choice we can at the time; then by adding choices we increase the quality of our decisions. Of course, sometimes you might want to have no choice so that the full power of commitment is at your fingertips. And that - choosing to create a no-choice environment, is also a choice.
Anyone can do anything given the right strategy. This belief is highly useful in empowering you to manifest your dreams. Think of it this way - can you fly an airplane? Likely not. Yet, with precise step by step instructions, you can become a pilot, and it's easier than you think. The key is small-chunk step by step instruction, e.g. pull this lever, look at that dial, adjust this mirror. When we reduce anything that looks complicated, be it high yield investing, enlightenment or writing a best selling book, into small enough steps, then anyone can follow the steps and get the result. In our years of coaching and training, we have seen many examples of people lacking even the most rudimentary abilities who have risen to the top in their chosen path. As for famous examples, Cher, Mark Twain, Ray Kroc (founder of McDonald's), George Washington, Albert Einstein were all elementary or high school dropouts. Look at them now!
There is no such thing as failure, only feedback. You want the result X, so you do a sequence of steps A and instead get an outcome Y. Is that a failure? Yes, it's a failure to get the result X. But is it useful for you to think this way? What kinds of emotional states do you connect to the word 'failure'? How would you feel if someone called you a 'failure'? Instead, let's look at it from a different point of view. What actually happened was that you got feedback that the sequence of steps A generates outcome Y. And now you are looking for another sequence of steps that will get you the result X that you wanted. Failure and feedback are two sides of the same coin. You choose which way of thinking supports you best.
The meaning of the communication is the response you get. Whenever you are communicating with others, it is your job to get your point across. If they don't get it, you didn't say it the right way for them. If they blow you off, you didn't create enough rapport. If they didn't hear you, you didn't say it loud enough.
Andra bloggares åsikter om Framgång, effektivitet, produktivitet, motivation, inspiration, NLP, personlig utveckling, mental träning, psykologi, filosofi, livsfilosofi, utveckling, växa, mål, målsättningar, disciplin, att lyckas, lycka
Inga kommentarer:
Skicka en kommentar